Where have I been? Watching TV! Duh.

OK, it’s been a while since I posted, but I’ve been in a bit of a funk for the last couple of weeks (a phrase learnt from Glee when it was still awesome). I did a bit of singing into the mirror in Glee style to try and help, but probably chose the wrong song in style of Adele, Someone Like You. It didn’t help.

So across the weeks I’ve been going to bed later, getting up later in the day and letting my sleep pattern become more and more nocturnal. What is there to watch really late into the night? Well there’s South Park and Two and a Half Men marathons on Comedy Central of course! I have become a little bit obsessed with South Park over the last 2 weeks. I’d always liked it, but don’t think I’d actually sat down and watched a bunch of episodes in a long time. And the best thing I’ve noticed about it is that even seeing old episodes is entertaining because old or new, each episode holds the same premise of 4 kids and their naivety in adult subjects, and of course Cartman being a total dick. My favourite episodes so far? Obviously Scott Tenorman must die, and almost any episode where Butters has a central role – you just can’t help but love this poor kid.

Of course there’s plenty of entertaining things to watch where you don’t have to wait until 2 o’clock in the morning. Over the last 8 weeks I have gotten totally sucked into the Apprentice, to the point where I need to talk to someone about it afterwards and give my opinion (I’ve even made my mum watch it, which is pretty crap because after every episode when I ask her opinion she replies with ‘Whatever’). I think the new prize of starting a business with Lord ‘Sir Alan’ Sugar makes this season very hard to predict. Any other series and Tom would have been fired long ago, but Lord Sugar definitely sees something in him, and I think Jim would have been a clear winner in previous series with his top selling abilities. This series has been a notch higher than others with much ballsier contenders (of course would have to be if they want to be their own boss) and until we’ve heard what the finalists’ business plans are, it is pretty difficult to predict it. I’d say it was anyone’s game. Apart from Natasha. She’s crap. I also think that talking about the Apprentice cannot be complete until I’ve mentioned the brilliance of Lord Sugar’s sidekicks – Nick, who I love, and Karen, who I also think is great in her own right; any time that either of them pipe up in the boardroom and give their opinion on the task just makes it that little bit more exciting. I particularly enjoy it when they appear on ‘You’re Fired’ afterwards and give us that inside information. I love that there’s a Junior version as well because it means that I get 2 fixes of the show in one year. There’s something about sitting down and trying to work out who’s going to get fired, and if you miss it, avoiding all forms of social networking or any type of actual human interaction in fear of finding out before watching the show. Brilliant show.

Now. One Tree Hill. I wasn’t that fussed about catching up with last season because it was aired when I was in Australia. But I’d already seen half the season and my mum had Sky+d the rest, so I watched it. And it ended with a right bang. Now it was kind of obvious that they weren’t going to kill off both, or even one at that matter, of the 2 new characters that they had just introduced to replace Lucas and Peyton. Anyone who fell for that is so easily fooled that they should be off watching … OK I can’t think of anything that I don’t watch myself, and come to think of it One Tree Hill isn’t really known for it’s thrilling believable drama and should be taken with a pinch of salt. So maybe I should start again with the attitude I have when watching the show.

Oh my gooooood, I can’t believe they were shot, I cried like, a lot. They can’t die. And Clay is so hot (not as hot as Lucas but still hot because you have to be to be on the show). Oh my god they can’t die when they’ve just embraced their love for each other – which wasn’t brought about really quickly at all. The dream of them being on the beach was so beautiful and I cried again when they realised that they’d been shot and Quinn had to leave Clay, like, oh my god. I mean I was so sucked in by the storyline that I haven’t even noticed Quinn’s hair turning to blonde and then a bit dark again and then with streaks and then blonde again. That is until they show her in the subtitles and you see how really dark her hair was before she was shot! OK I’ll stop making fun, because you can’t really watch One Tree Hill in a serious manner. It’s one of those dramas that is so over the top in everything that you just need to forget that things like this don’t really happen and people aren’t that reasonable and lovely and pretty with awesome hair. Normally I do let it all go and will cry a lot in the emotional parts and go ‘Aaaaw’ when it’s anything to do with James Lucas Scott. But, and I don’t know why, but Quinn’s ever changing hair is really annoying me this season. Whether the show isn’t as good at doing what it does any more, or whether I can’t buy into it any more and have become way too cynical, I just can’t help but roll my eyes whenever she’s on screen. I’m going to put it down to me being depressed and never leaving the house and being unemployed that I just have to pick at everything (I mean, I do scowl at happy people whenever I do leave the house). But if any other keen OTH fans are feeling the same, please let me know so I can feel like there’s a bit of hope for me and my cynicism yet.

I have much more to say (it has been weeks since I last posted and I’ve been on the telly again!) but I think I’ll leave it there for now because I am still kind of in a funk and I don’t want to totally bitch about everything and make you all think I’m a miserable cow. It’s a good job I included my Apprentice opinion because it shows I do think that some things on the telly can be done well!

Remember to watch tonight’s Apprentice!


Square Eyes xx

P.S. I turned 22 last Friday. It was a bit of a rubbish birthday. I didn’t do anything on the day, it got a bit better when I went to see Bridesmaids (my kind of humour and review to come) but then I had a fat argument with my Dad and haven’t really spoken to him since. Happy Birthday!

I’m famous don’t you know…?

Yes, I was on TV! Did anyone see Lee Mack’s All Star Cast on Saturday? Did you not see me clapping for about 3 seconds? What? You didn’t?! Well it’s a good job I have some screen shots here for you!

Let me take you on a journey. We arrived into the studio (after waiting in a marquee for about 2 hours!). It looked really cool.

We were sat down for about an hour before anything happened. And there was lots of shooting of just us laughing, cheering, clapping, wooping, and anything else you can think of. All for this – yes, it’s me on TV!!

I’m centre shot (yep, I’m the focus :P) And my friend Sarah is on the left. This was on BBC 1 on a Saturday night, all for about 3 seconds. That’s right!! My 3 seconds of fame. But wait. There’s more:

There I am for an extra 3 seconds! And to finish it off:

Having a laugh at one last joke (centre shot again might I add)

So there you have it. You’re reading the blog of a girl who’s made her TV debut and it lasted all of about 9 seconds! Result!!

In all seriousness, I went to watch the show being filmed out of interest of how these things are done, and because I am a genuine fan of Lee Mack. I saw his last tour ‘Going Out’ when he was in Cardiff – and was front row then. Even had a bit of a chat with him! (OK now I’m just bragging!)

So even if you’re not bothered about me being in it (sort of), you should check out Lee Mack’s All Star Cast. You can see it now on BBC Iplayer, or I’m sure it’s on YouTube for overseas readers. Guests are Shane Richie and Henry Winkler, comedy from Milton Jones, and music from The Feeling.


from (the still grounded, honest!) Square Eyes x

P.S. I can’t work out why the 3 pictures won’t show until you click on them. They were PrtSc shots, whereas the first is taken from my camera. If anyone can help me figure that out give me a shout!

Road rage!

I just had to get this off my chest, and seeing as all of my friends have now moved home from uni and I’m left with only my parents to talk to – and the one parent that I actually do talk to (my mum) has gone out to watch the polo with her friends (yes, it comes to something when even your mother has a better social life than you), I just had to write a post.

I am normally a very calm driver, traffic doesn’t really bother me unless I’m really late for something (which is rare because I don’t normally have anything to go to). I’m always up for giving my parents a lift somewhere and picking them up late at night, and it honestly doesn’t bother me. When I’m a passenger with my dad driving I do get frustrated because he suffers from proper road rage – and today, I think a part of it was passed on to me. But, when I tell you what actually happened, I hope that you’ll feel I was perfectly in the right!

Incident 1.

It happened in Barry. I feel that saying this right at the start will put most people in my favour (if you know where Barry is anyway). It was a white van driver. Now anyone that wasn’t convinced before, should now be 100% on my side. Anyway. I turned into a road that had a number of cars parked on the opposite side of the road (not affecting my side), and the white van driver was coming the other way. Refusing to wait at the end of the parked cars for me to come through (as I had right of way) he just drives straight towards me full pelt, for me to slam on the brakes. At this point we’re both facing each other (on my side of the road) with no room to pass. He looks at me and starts gesturing in the means of “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?! Move back! Get out of my way!!” At this point I was also gesturing in a more polite way that said “Seriously?! I’ve done nothing wrong.” Now, I’m more angry at myself for this incident, because I did move back for him, and pretty quickly at that. A more ballsy me would like to think that I would not move and that he should move back, as he is on my side of the road and I had right of way. And if he refused to I would have got out and said – “Get off my side of the road! Wanker.” But my mum was in the car with me, and I believe this had a lot to do with my instant backing down. Instead I flicked him the V as he passed and just felt generally angry, with him and, more than anything, with myself.

Incident 2.

Totally not my fault. And not a big deal really, on any other day I would have laughed and carried on, but combined with Incident 1 it just made me think “I must blog about this later!! Grrrrr!”. An asian couple stopped at a pedestrian crossing. I have to say at this point they were lucky that I had just dropped my mum off, and had only reached about 20mph, otherwise I think I would have run both of them over. They looked to their left (the direction I wasn’t coming from) and started to cross. I was only a couple of yards away from them so how they didn’t see me I don’t know. My light was green, the red man was saying to them very clearly “DON’T WALK” but they must have thought – naaaah we’ll be fine. I managed to slam on the brakes (OK I was only doing 20mph, so I touched the brakes, but I’m going for a dramatic effect) and missed them by inches. But, what made it worse – they didn’t even see me then!!!! I had to beep my horn and do a gesture courtesy of white van man of “What the fuck are you doing?!”. They however, just shrugged, laughed with each other, and kept walking. Let this be a lesson to you bloggers – look BOTH ways before you cross the street, because not all drivers will be going as slow, or would have been as good at their hazard perception test as me.

Total day for road rage. My mum can get a taxi home, because I’m not leaving again today for fear of actually crashing and killing someone.

Thanks for allowing me to vent my frustration. I feel loads better.


Square Eyes x

A week where I moved from the sofa.

Granted, since quitting my first job in sales (well, in anything – full time – really) about 3 weeks ago, I haven’t done much that required me to move from the sofa. Watching seasons 2-4 of Grey’s Anatomy whilst grazing on chocolate was really fun, but there’s only so much crying in your pj’s at 3 o’clock in the afternoon that you can do before you start looking sad. Really sad. So this week, I actually left the house and did stuff – on more than one occasion!

Tuesday evening saw me venture out with the folks to watch the Britain’s Got Talent tour. Now, before you judge me and instantly fob me off as a complete saddo, I am normally a very cynical person when it comes to talent shows and their format. I’m sure I’ll branch out into my opinion of Cheryl Cole at some point in one of my posts. Anyway, I tuned into BGT this year to see how one of my favourite comedians – Mr Michael McIntyre – would get on (and I think it’s easy to say that he stole the show. Piers who?), and it seemed a good idea to get these tickets as a gift to my dad for Father’s Day, and controversy claims aside I did have a soft spot for little Ronan Parke too.

So, the show itself was actually rather entertaining, albeit quite short, but then there were a lot of kids there. It took a lot of energy for me to ignore my dad’s moaning about how rubbish most of the contestants were (to be fair, Jean Martyn was a bit of a disappointment, but Steven Hall was surprisingly funny) but the whole crowd piped down once Ronan stepped onto the stage and started singing. That kid has got one heck of a powerful voice! It’s going to be interesting to see what route Simon Cowell takes him down now, whether it will be singing big songs that are way too old for him, or doing current Bieber covers that his voice is just too good for. It’s quite hard to see what his target audience will be, but I can’t say I don’t enjoy listening to his voice.

As for this year’s winner … what’s that? You can’t remember who it was? Well… once you actually hear Jai McDowall sing live, it’s pretty clear why he won. My seats were pretty close to the stage (and thank god for that, because there were no screens for people sat in the back of the arena) and I could see the vein bulging in his neck as he hit those big notes. It’s much clearer the type of route he’ll be taking when he releases his album pretty soon under Simon Cowell (I haven’t read any confirmations of this, but I’m making a pretty safe assumption). Jai’s style will probably target the same that Susan Boyle hit – West End numbers and ballads, and we all know how successful she’s been. I only hope that Jai can match that success, or just get close to it, because his voice is 10 times better than hers – but he’s not as odd looking, and I do see Susan’s looks to be a huge contributor to her success.

All in all it was a good show, and the other contestants gave a good performance too, topped off with some funny links from presenter Stephen Mulhern, who doesn’t receive as much credit as he should.

For me, Wednesday has to be the highlight of my week. Me and a friend, Sarah, took a nice trip down to the Pinewood Studios in Slough to watch this week’s recording of Lee Mack’s All Star Cast. Even though the trip started off with a bit of a hiccup and a detour to Port Talbot and back due to an unexploded wartime bomb, we got down to Slough with very little trouble. Once we got into the studios though, it became incredibly clear how rude people behind the scenes of television can be, and actually how many people really want to be on TV. The waiting area was filled with people trying to get the attention of some of the runners who were choosing people to take part in the show, and once we were sat in our audience seats, the attention seeking didn’t stop there. I almost felt sorry for one guy who I saw talking to anyone he could catch hold of. Look out for him on this Saturday’s show as he might be doing the link at the beginning of the show – mentioning that he should be on Crimewatch. I don’t like sounding mean, but I was also quite pleased when one group of girls who had been chosen to say something didn’t get their chance as Lee was ad-libbing too much other audience members.

Even though we didn’t get very good seats, were behind cameras for a lot of it and ended the night with huge cricks in our necks, it was a great experience to get to see how these shows are filmed. Mainly – not in order. The recording started off with a lovely performance from The Feeling and Sophie Ellis-Bextor which is to be shown at the end of the show on Saturday. We also got to see a hell of a lot of footage that isn’t going to be used; mainly a lot of extremely rude jokes from Lee Mack, but also some crap stories from audience members that really just want their faces on TV. It’s worth a watch on Saturday though I’d say, Shane Richie is his usual upbeat self, and Henry Winkler came across as a genuinely nice guy. Give the show a watch as well because there’s a chance you might catch a glimpse of me wooping and cheering to something – a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment.

After such an exciting evening (OK we were sat down for 3 hours, and there was a lull during a number of the pick ups and re-shoots – just a few terms I picked up, check me out – but we were given some sweets at the end) I had to then drive all the way back to Cardiff. Doing that double journey in one day (plus the detour to Port Talbot) was actually quite exhausting! There’s almost no road lights on the M4, and being almost the only car on it, it was kinda creepy. Sarah and I stopped off in one of the services on the way back too at 1 o’clock in the morning (at this point I was regretting ever watching any type of horror film), the place was deserted apart from the odd weird looking man, but I was in desperate need of a few shots of espresso if I was going to make it home. We finally made it home at 2am, just in time for me to crash in my bed and not resurface until 12 the next day, and even then I felt like I was hungover! The first time I’ve driven outside of Cardiff and it really took it out of me, but it was fun screeching to Rihanna’s album and a bunch of Glee songs on the way back to make sure I was wide awake. It also meant that I got to behave in a hangover-like manner the following day, which of course involved a trip to Subway. Now, this was in the centre of Barry town, but I was cheered up when a lushess man in tracksuit bottoms and a polo shirt (yes, with an up-turned collar) walked in. Getting a bit of eye candy in a day really does cheer me up. However I looked like death and hadn’t bothered doing anything with my hair, so he didn’t ask me to be his girlfriend. Gutted.

Well, after a busy week I felt it only right to give my lovely sofa some attention, I had abandoned it for most of the week don’t forget! I was worried that the dent that fits my ass might have started to lose it’s shape! But, I couldn’t give it my undying attention. Before my Mum left for work she gave me the old sad look and begged for me to do some housework. I felt, seeing as she lets me live in her house rent free and she gave me her car for my trip to Slough on Wednesday, that it was only fair for me to offer my talented skills in cleaning (I was tempted to start my own cleaning business after uni, but then I thought …. ew.)

But all is not lost when it comes to TV time. I found out that I can still watch TV even when I’m not sat on the sofa eating fatty foods! Polishing, hoovering, and doing the dishes can all be completed with the box still on. Granted I wasn’t watching anything that required my absolute attention – I would never dream of doing this during Grey’s Anatomy or Doctor Who – but it’s perfectly achievable with the tennis on in the background. No – Wimbledon still hasn’t managed a day without rain, but I am glad the roof in centre court is finally earning it’s keep, even if it did mean Andy Roddick losing in the 3rd Round (I am gutted).

A pretty long post, with no real point other than me summing up my week – most probably just so that I can remember what I’ve done. Sleeping in until 1pm everyday, and then just sitting on the sofa does make the days merge into one, and then I forget pretty much everything unless it’s been shown on TV. But more sofa time means more to write about, and Friday TV certainly has given me some things to share my opinion on. Until the next time – where I will actually start reviewing some of the stuff I’ve seen (believe it or not, I am taking notes!).

Much love to you if you made it this far, Square Eyes x

P.S. A shout has to be made to my friend Emily, or Pookie as she is known in the blogging world, who is now out there in the real world after graduating in Chemistry. However, unlike me, she has no plans to form a new relationship with her sofa, and in the short weeks since finishing has already got herself an interview for a cracking job. I don’t want to put any jinxes on it, so all I plan to do at this point is wish her the best of luck! She has a pretty awesome blog focused on fashion (which I have absolutely none of!) but if you do I recommend taking a look.

Hello bloggers!

I hate for my first post to start with a cliche – but hello to everyone out there!

I’m totally new to blogging, and feel like I have so much in my head that I don’t know which to write first. I thought I’d start with things being very basic – as you can tell by the format and theme, and gradually build everything up. To do this I will need plenty of help from you other bloggers out there, so comments and advice on how to improve my blog – be it the style or content, is greatly appreciated.

Let me give you all a quick summary of me, and what I want to do with this blog. The tagline above is pretty much the basics of it – I love TV. In school I was the walking TV Guide, and not much has changed now, although I have managed to steer myself away from depressing UK soap operas. I had a 6 month break of watching stuff when I was travelling, but it didn’t take me long to catch up, and what with all of my friends finishing uni now and moving back home (and away from me, boo!) I have even more time to sit on my ass and stare at the screen. Maybe a future blog will discuss how to feed my love of TV without feeding my urge to graze on chocolate and becoming a(n even bigger) couch potato.

I think before I move on to what I’ll look to be talking about as I get a better hang of this, a mention needs to be made of Ryan Dunn. As a massive fan of Jackass, in particular the 3 movies, it was extremely sad to hear of his passing today. It was only last week that I was watching Jackass 3 for the first time (as it was in cinemas when I was travelling in the middle of nowhere) and was once again entertained and equally disgusted. Even though it ended without giving much hope of a fourth instalment, a part of me still hoped that the gang would all get together again someday and continue to gross us all out. It is sad for someone to die so young, but no one can argue that he didn’t live his life to the full! Thanks to Ryan for sharing his hilarious experience of shoving a toy car up his ass with all of us, and rest in peace.

There’s so many things on the way now for me to write about. A new season of One Tree Hill is starting soon (please no spoilers from those who have already seen it in America), so I look forward to that. I’ll try and get round to things that have just finished, such as Glee, and a mid season break mention of Doctor Who. As for right now – I’m going to see the Britain’s Got Talent tour tomorrow, and I’m off to watch a recording of Lee Mack’s new show on Wednesday, so I’ll be sure to update you all on those outings. And of course Wimbledon has just started! So be ready for plenty of rain delays and old matches of John McEnroe, Bjorn Borg and Boris Becker to be shown.

That’s it for my first post, apologies for the roughness of it. Now I’m off to watch lots of interviews on the BBC as Day 1 of Wimbledon has kicked off and there’s already a rain break!

Cheers x